oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Randomize
