lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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