i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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