So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
