my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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