Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Randomize