Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Randomize