We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
