I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
found the other keg... it's in the tree
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
