You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
you traded sex for a burrito?
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
