im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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