This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I just found a bag of teeth...
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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