my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
