Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
