Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
