He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i used baking grease as lip gloss
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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