Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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