i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Randomize
