i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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