im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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