So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
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