He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
