Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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