You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
