he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
