I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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