I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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