u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
She's the barista slut.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize
