i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize