I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I need to calm my uterus...
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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