I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
