Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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