Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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