My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
