the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
there is puke in my bra ... again
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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