like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize