maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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