You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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