New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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