You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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