The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
