I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
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