I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Even my vagina gasped.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
