I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Your cock deserves a montage
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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