1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
