I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize