the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Randomize
