I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize