Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Randomize