yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
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