ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Randomize
