I'm so fucking centered right now
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
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